Blended to School | Classroom Giveaway (ENDED)

23, August 2010 by ·

I have a little secret to share with you.

The life of a blended family is complicated. Right, I know that’s a big shocker.

See, there are close to 12 years difference between my youngest step daughter and my oldest son. Trying to find family outings that all of us can enjoy is usually hard. If a place is perfect for the big kids, it’s not age appropriate for the little kids and if it’s perfect for the little kids the big kids are going to be bored. But there is a certain time of the summer that bridges the gap. You know the time I’m talking about; that time when mother’s everywhere breath a sigh of relief because the countdown has begun. The countdown to the end of fighting, the end of hearing that so dreaded phase, “I’m bored.” That’s right folks, I’m talking about Back To School time!

Back to SchoolBack to School shopping is a time when ALL of my children have a commonality. I get to sit, or rather stand, at the back of the shopping cart and marvel as my kids bond over pencil boxes, folders, and glue sticks. In years past I’ve witnessed my then 4 and 16 year old crack up laughing over not recognizing a pencil sharpener when they see it. I’ve been blessed to see my older kids become little ones again as they help their younger siblings pick out the coolest pencils or the most awesome backpack.

Make Back to School shopping a time when your kids can enjoy one another. If the kids in your household are closer in age than give them their own school lists and partner them up. Give them a budget for the supplies and then set them loose. (It’s probably a good idea to research prices first so you can set a reasonable budget.) I think you will be amazed at how they can work together as a team and have fun in the process. And if you are like me and your kids are further apart, still partner them up. The younger kids will look to their older siblings for advice and the older kids will being idolized. Now I’m not saying you won’t have any bickering because they are still siblings; but if you look at the experience as a whole it will be enjoyable.

With all the other complications of living in a blended family, the visitation, differing parenting styles, and child support, just to name a few; the last thing you need to do is add to the list.

Whether the age gap is 10 years or 10 months, let them enjoy this bonding time with each other because really, that’s what being a family is all about.

ClassWish LogoThe good folks at VolunteerSpot and ClassWish care about getting your school year and teacher off to a great start, that’s why they are offering Volunteer Spotone of my readers a $50 gift certificate for classroom supplies for your favorite teacher!

RULES FOR ENTRY:
In a comment please leave the name of the teacher or classroom you would give the $50 in supplies to.

EXTRA ENTRY:
Tweet the following (please leave a comment and link to each tweet, allowed once a day)
“Start the school year right! Win $50 for classroom of your choice from @ClassWish @VolunteerSpot and @MadHatterMom http://bit.ly/cGy1Ll”

GIVEAWAY ENDS SEPT. 6th

Originally posted as part of VolunteerSpot’s Views on Back to School Bloggers’ Series. VolunteerSpot’s free online sign up sheets save time, eliminate reply-all email, and make it easy for more parents to get involved at school. Register at VolunteerSpot before October 1st, 2010 using promotion code “TeachersSave” for a chance to win $100 in free classroom supplies for the teacher of your choice from ClassWish.

Filed Under: Blended Life, Giveaways, Kids · Tagged With: ,

A Rite of Passage?

18, March 2010 by · 3 Comments
high school drama

Photo credit: Dean Terry

I was reminded today why, for no amount of money, I would not return to high school.

My stepdaughter has been in a funk lately. We couldn’t figure out what was going on so this morning on our way to school we stopped off to get a coffee and I asked. Now mind you we had asked before and gotten the canned teenage answer of “I’m fine.” So I figured a coffee bribe would work. :)

Thankfully, she told me that she, essentially, has been having some self esteem and confidence issues because of a group of kids that think in order to feel good about themselves they need to make others feel bad. I have to say that I am so very proud of her for the way she is handling it but it is taking it’s toll on her.

During our conversation she asked me if I was teased in high school. Boy, did a flood of memories come back to me. Here is just the short list of things I got teased about:

  • Acne
  • Hairy arms
  • My laugh
  • My weight (I was a size 10. What I wouldn’t give to be that again!)
  • My car (hey, at least I had one!)
  • I have a big nose
  • Basically, anything and everything I did, said, wore, you name it.

I know, in my deepest being, that had I not had to endure this type of ridicule I wouldn’t be the person I am today, but it still hurt. High school is a time of self discovery and I feel like because I was ridiculed as much as I was, I turned to other things to make me feel good about myself. No, I didn’t do any drugs, but I did start exploring in sex at an early age.  I lost my virginity at the age of 16 and became pregnant before I turned 17. Sadly, that pregnancy ended in miscarriage after I witnessed my then boyfriend die in a car crash. So there was something else I dealt with much earlier than anyone should.

So, I again I lean back on my theory that I would not be the person I am without all these experiences happening during high school but then I think am I better off? I mean I am essentially the way that God made me, so in would lend true that no matter what my high school career dished out I would have become who I am.

As a parent I don’t want my children to endure anything close to what I did in high school. It saddens me to no end that my daughter is dealing with this in school, but then perhaps this is the path that He has laid out for her.

It brings me to my final question. Is high school a rite of passage or a means to the end?

Filed Under: Blended Life, joys of motherhood · Tagged With: , ,

Sometimes, love just IS enough..

9, September 2009 by · 2 Comments

I use Facebook for keeping in touch with family members, high school friends, all my fellow mommy bloggers, and companies.

It really is a great tool, plus just a lot of fun! I can spend hours on the thing just reloading to see who has posted something.

However; I didn’t think that Facebook would change my view of my step daughter.

You see my step daughters have never been asked to call me “mom”. From the time I met them I have always been “Tina.” When introduced to friends it was “Tina.”

Now, I will be honest. My oldest step daughter and I do not have a very good relationship. Perhaps, I didn’t put in enough effort or I just got burned too many times; regardless my youngest step daughter B and I have gotten along a lot better. B was the inspiration of this post.

Recently, while on Facebook I received a notification. You know the little red box in the lower right had corner that lights up when one of your friends does something. Well, I clicked on it and the simple sentence I read made my heart jump…

“B has listed you as her mother.”

Does she call me mom.. no. But I don’t mind; I have learned that loving and supporting is enough to make her happy.
MHM

Filed Under: Blended Life, joys of motherhood ·

It’s a bennie…

26, August 2009 by · Leave a Comment

There are days when I think back and wonder what ever persuaded me at the age of 22, to marry a man 10 years older than me and who already had 2 daughters.
Of course, the answer is always love. That darn addicting feeling that draws you in and fights you when you try to leave it.
I don’t regret my decision but there are always those thoughts in the back of your head saying, “What if…”

Well, today was one of those days when I am thanking God for giving me the step-daughters I have.

I work part-time as a 9-1-1 dispatcher. The luxury is I get to choose my hours based on the available overtime. The down side is, sometimes I only have graveyard shifts to choose from. Last night was one of those times. I was scheduled to work from 11pm to 3am. Usually I’m able to get to sleep right when I get home but for some reason I couldn’t get to sleep until after 4am! It definitely makes it hard to get moving when your little ones come in your room at 6:30!

Well my youngest step-daughter, who is actually 17, (It’s hard to believe trust me, I met her when she was 7,) stepped right up and helped out. When she woke up the kids instantly wanted to go down stairs with her and she didn’t hesitate. She fed them breakfast and kept them entertained while I dozed on and off upstairs.

Now sure this isn’t a HUGE deal. But just the fact that she did this on her own. I didn’t ask her, or tell her to do it. She just DID it!

It makes me so proud that I had a hand in raising her and she’s turning into such a caring, compassionate young lady. It keeps the hope alive that I’m raising my young kids right too!

photo credit: tabrandt

MHM

Filed Under: Blended Life, joys of motherhood ·
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