When Camel Toe Happens to Good People

So, after a bloody long bit of a hiatus at the gym, I’m headed back this week.

As I’ve vented a bit in the Mamavation FB Group I have put on a little weight since my last campaign. I, by no means, am happy with this and it’s what’s really driving me back to the gym.

Since it’s been a while and my body has changed a bit I thought I would go through and try on a few pieces of my workout gear just to make sure they were comfortable. Nothing worse than being uncomfortable while working out, am I right?

So, I put on one of my favorite pair of Nike running pants, they are my favorite because they have a drawstring which prevents them from riding down while I’m running along. They still felt pretty good, a little snug around the waist but not uncomfortable.

Then I looked in the mirror. HOLY CAMEL-TOE BATMAN!

Not quite the look I want to be sporting when I walk into my all women gym.

Naturally, my blogging mind took off and I started thinking up this post and how I could provide all my fellow lady gym goers a few tips/tricks on how to prevent this less than desirable fashion statement.

First, let me start off by saying, DO NOT GOOGLE IMAGES OF CAMEL-TOE! At least not if you don’t want to have to try to scrub your brain free of what you just saw.

That said, I did find some interesting articles on the subject. I learned that some men actually like a woman to show a little toe during working out and not surprisingly, there were no instances of women enjoying seeing some other ladies nether regions.

Now here are some tips/tricks to help prevent this craptastic faux-pas from happening to you.

  • The most sure fire way is to avoid wearing tight clothing or clothing that is too small.
  • Avoid wearing 100% spandex clothing.
  • Wear underwear. I know, this seems like common sense, but I know a lot of ladies that don’t wear panties when they work out.
  • Purchase clothing that doesn’t have just a single seam going through the crotch area. If you can find ones that break into a V just before the cooter area. Having that seam go straight through there is just asking for it. Lululemon actually makes great workout bottoms that are made to help prevent this. One of the key features is “the gusset helps keep your lady bits comfortable (and says no to the ‘Toe!)” However, there has been a recent recall of their yoga pants due to the fact that although they prevent “the toe” everyone still may be able to see your lady bits because the fabric is see through.
  • If you can’t change the clothing you wear you can still prevent the dreaded ‘toe’. Simply take a panty liner and place it in the usual spot, but turn the liner on its side. Fold it in half and make sure it sits across the anatomy in question like a Band-Aid. The liner will create a smooth barrier between you and your pants.

Now is none of the tips/tricks work for you, then guess what, I discovered some products made to prevent this unsightly wardrobe malfunction, here are just a sampling and my thoughts on them.

camelflage

First I give you Camelflage. These are actually panties that you purchase that have an insert sewn into the crotch area. “..these panties work to keep you confident, comfortable and smooth in tight situations.” I have to say that of all the products I found, this would be the only one I would even considering buying.

cuchiniThis is the Cuchini. Apparently this is the product for you for a number of reasons, including, “if your bathing suit is showing a little too much of the wrong cleavage.” YIKES!. There’s a mental picture I didn’t need. I’m not quite sure if I would want to put something that looks like a bicycle seat in my bathing suit. It would be my luck that I would be swimming around and suddenly see it floating next to me, yeah know what I’m saying?? Plus, I’m not sure what the purpose of that little raised area is in the middle.
Now, if in addition to camel toe you are also dealing with your headlights coming on at the wrong moments, this company also sells Invisinips. True story.

smoothgrooveLastly, I give you SmoothGroove. If you have ever wondered what it would be like to wear a cup then this is the one for you. This bad boy is made from mold-able plastic. I imagine that having that fancy scroll-work on your crotch area makes up for having a plastic maxi-pad in your underwear. All day.
Although I couldn’t find the answer on the site, by the looks of it that scroll-work area looks to be almost a vent area. At least I hope it is because I can only imagine what it would smell like after wearing it for a workout.

And now you can imagine that too. You’re welcome. ­čÖé

Seriously, ladies.. Take heed of these suggestions because you never want to be at the gym and have someone tell you, “Nice lips” and realize they aren’t looking at your face.

Comments

  1. Thank You for writing this! I’ve seen way too many at the gym before. It’s disgusting.. get a cup ladies!! LOL
    Candy @ Candypolooza┬┤s last blog post ..Blissdom Recaps Linky

  2. Thank you, I think. While I didn’t need most of those lovely visuals dancing through my mind, I will admit I appreciate the information provided on the products. Unfortunately, those of us with ‘a little weight on’ have this problem all too often.

    • I’m there with you Kay.. I’m all about paying it forward so I apologize for the visuals you may have received, but seriously, I’m still scrubbing my eyes after my initial image search on the subject.

  3. I love how you mention Lululemon given their past week of “scandal” – no toe but…
    kia┬┤s last blog post ..AinÔÇÖt No Thang But Time

    • LOL.. I know.. I was going to put something in there like “you may not have a toe but everyone will still get to see all your bits” but decided against it.. actually, I’m going to add that in!

  4. Rebecca @RUtheMOMof says:

    THANK YOU !!!! This should be mandatory reading for anyone including some men ( mangini ). No matter how cute you think your workout gear is I should not be able to see if you have a brazilian.

  5. Lol you so needed a sponsor on this post! I love you, Tina! you always make me laugh!
    Pepper┬┤s last blog post ..What is Pepper Planning to Eat? (Menu Plan Mar 25th)

  6. Not only is this hilarious, it is well researched and informative! No mo’ toe!
    Sarah @mamasarahjane┬┤s last blog post ..Mamavation Monday

  7. Also, when you get a job as a camel toe model, is that something you share with your friends and family? “Got my first modeling gig! Look for my vagina in the next camelflage ad!”
    Sarah @mamasarahjane┬┤s last blog post ..Mamavation Monday

  8. Awwww you are so back and my cooter thanks you for this post

  9. Wiping away the tears from laughing so much!! Great to have you back you have been missed for sure!!!
    April Ockerman┬┤s last blog post ..Tiptoe Tuesday Giveaway Linky 3/26

  10. Oh, I am now following you, for sure and for certain. I am now laughing so much that my kid is wondering what is wrong with me. All I can think is PREVENT THE TOE. Great post – sharing, sharing and sharing.
    Elizabeth Towns┬┤s last blog post ..Officially Missing You #31MarchDay

  11. OMG Tina, you crack me up SO much. Between you and Decki, it’s amazing I can still breathe.
    Joanna @way2gomom┬┤s last blog post ..Mamavation Monday: Break’s Over

  12. OMG you are too funny! LOVE this!
    Kristin @littlemamajama┬┤s last blog post ..Down the Rabbit Hole

  13. OMG I am at my desk with kids in detention trying not to die of laughing! Love this!
    Mommahunt┬┤s last blog post ..Mamavation Monday-Week 11

  14. Thank you for the PSA on cameltoe, Tina! You kill me. <3
    Angela @ Nine More Months┬┤s last blog post ..#Mamavation Monday – Slow and steady

  15. Thanks for the laughs! Great job making it back to the gym.
    Dee┬┤s last blog post ..Eager for Spring

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